I work at Elmbrook Church and I was
reading through some of our new material that we are using in our Life Group Bible Studies. While I was reading
from our new “Rooted and Released Study Guide,” I read this passage:
In
1990, Robertson McQuilkin, the president of Columbia Bible College, knew he
needed to make a decision about his career. The school needed him 100 percent,
and his wife, Muriel, who had been diagnosed with Alzheimer’s disease almost
ten years earlier, now needed him 100 percent. In the end, Robertson said, “The
choice to step down from my position was an easy one for me to make.” Perhaps
the best explanation can be found in the letter he wrote to the Columbia Bible
College constituency to explain his decision:
...recently it has become apparent that
Muriel is contented most of the time she is with me and almost none of the time
I am away from her. It is not just “discontent.” She is filled with fear—even
terror—that she has lost me and always goes in search of me when I leave home. So
it is clear to me that she needs me now, full-time...
The decision was made, in a way, 42
years ago when I promised to care for Muriel “in sickness and in health…till
death do us part.” So, as I told the students and faculty, as a man of my word,
integrity has something to do with it. But so does fairness. She has cared for
me fully and sacrificially all these years; if I cared for her for the next 40
years I would not be out of her debt.
Duty, however, can be grim and stoic.
But there is more: I love Muriel. She is a delight to me—her childlike
dependence and confidence in me, her warm love, occasional flashes of what wit
I used to relish so, her happy spirit and tough resilience in the face of her
continual distressing frustration. I don’t have to care for her. I get to! It
is a high honor to care for so wonderful a person.
What an amazing thing to do for someone else: to sacrifice
yourself and your desires to better love someone else. Robertson gave up his
career to care for his wife and with a joyful attitude about it to boot!
Robertson said that this decision was an easy one to make. If I were to put
myself in his shoes and were faced with the decision to care for a person I
love dearly as they slowly regress into oblivion or to distance myself and focus
my mind elsewhere, I must say that some distance from that pain would be
easier. So why is it that Robertson said caring for his wife would be easier?
1 John 4:16 says, “God is love.” 1 John 4:19 says, “We love
because He first loved us.” These passages ensure that we are capable of love
because God’s love preceded us. Before iPhones, before ice cream, before social
media, before your boyfriend/girlfriend/best friend, before you or me, before
the world… God loved. He created us with the ability to love Him in return,
which made Him love us exponentially more than He already did (which was
already more than you or I could ever imagine). If that’s hard to comprehend, think
about it this way… I love my dog and I love my mom. My dog arguably loves me,
but she will also wag her tail and get excited for any random stranger with a
working hand to pet her and a treat in hand. My mom on the other hand, loves my
sisters and I with a completely different love. Yes, she loves her friends, but
given the choice between all her friends or me, I know she would choose me
every time. So even though I love my dog, Bella, a ton, I would pick my mom
over her because my mom can express her love to me in a multitude of ways and I
can do the same for her. It is a love without conditions. Now imagine that in
the context of God. Our love cannot even compare to the unique love He feels
for each an every person. In fact, He loves us so much that He sent His only
Son to die for us in the most painful way possible. That day on the cross is
when sacrificial love began. That is why Robertson could say with utmost
confidence that caring for his wife was the easier choice…because his life was
rooted in the One who gave him the capability to love sacrificially in the
first place. God.
As Elmbrook Church begins our series entitled “Rooted and
Released,” I am reminded of how much fuller my life is when I root myself in
God first and foremost. When I allow myself to be in awe daily of his goodness,
I allow myself the desire to be more like Him…the desire to root myself in Him
first and let everything else come second. Twelve days into the New Year of
2016, I have decided on a resolution that I know I can complete: to daily root
myself in the Lord. Whether that be through worship or reading my Bible or
listening and reflecting on a sermon, I choose to daily be rooted in Him.
