Monday, September 30, 2013

Wholly Dependent

So I'm on the bus to Cape, and what amazing people I have met already. A guy named Jack asked me a question a little bit ago. He said, "What would a superb year at Cape look like to you?" Now, what a thought-provoking question. I mean I know God intends to work in my life in crazy ways, but what do I think that will look like? I will be honest and say that I haven't purposefully made that picture in my mind. I think it's mostly because I accept the reality that I will walk away from Capernwray at the end of these nine months, changed. And I want that. I want an end result that is as close as possible to God's perfect image of and plan for me. I hope and pray that I will become a God fearing servant of my Lord. He knows I have never been wholly devoted, and that is something I deeply regret and wish I had made it a point to change. But this choice to go to Capernwray is my first step to becoming wholly devoted. I'm very excited for a year focused on Him and our relationship.

That one question made me think and realize so much about what I had been thinking and expecting. I guess I wasn't really expecting specifics and I'm very glad about that. I expect a lot of God's work in my life, though. I'm really glad that I'm putting that on Him because I know He will always follow through. Even if it's not in the exact way I expected. I'm wholly depending on His plan. And just like runners have to take that first step to get where they want to go, I've made my first step in being wholly devoted. And I think that step is being wholly dependent.

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